Blog
Shifting Perspective
When you’re raising a child with profound autism, your days are filled with both love and worry. For years, I carried a heavy bag of what ifs. What will happen when he’s an adult? Will he ever live independently? What will his life look like when I’m gone? And—if I’m honest—sometimes I compared. I compared our journey…
When Words Aren’t Needed
A few days ago, my nonverbal, profoundly autistic adult son underwent knee surgery. As any parent would, I’ve been consumed with worry — wondering if he’s in pain, if he’s scared, if he understands what’s happening. The hardest part of being his mom in moments like these isn’t just managing the logistics of his care —…
Isolation
Lately I’ve had this recurring dream. I’m stranded on a secluded island and spend the bulk of each day frantically waving my arms toward the sky hoping that someone may notice me and send help. It’s been said that our dreams are often rooted in reality. Well, in my case, the secluded island likely translates…
Why this Indiana family is moving to Colorado for their autistic son
Author: Brooke Hasch, WHAS 11 News Reporter Published: 12:43 PM EDT April 30, 2025 Families in Kentucky and Indiana struggle with autism services due to age restrictions and lack of facilities, forcing some to move for better care. CHARLESTOWN, Ind. — Families who rely on Autism services are facing a crisis across Kentucky and Indiana. There’s a…
Happy 22nd Birthday Skyler!
Beginning on Skyler’s first birthday, I started a tradition of writing a letter to him highlighting his likes, dislikes, achievements, funny moments, family adventures, playmates, and all of his favorite things. I also took a photo of him wearing a necktie as a way of charting his growth. My vision when creating and continuing this…
We’re Moving!!!
Announcement… We’re MOVING!!! For the entirety of my nonverbal, profoundly autistic son’s almost 22 years of life, I estimate that I’ve asked millions of questions, spent hundreds of hours on the phone fighting for services and funding, battled the ignorance of countless ‘experts’ who repeatedly underestimate his intelligence or overlook his abilities and have been…
Suffering in Silence
I’ve been absent from this page for several months and the truth is, it’s because we are really struggling, and I wasn’t sure what to say. I’ve wrestled with sharing my raw feelings and not diminishing the ‘hard’ we are experiencing through a silver lining filter out of fear of being labeled a complainer. But…
Celebrating Caregivers
While November is most notable for recognizing all that we are thankful for and gathering for a huge meal with family & friends, it is also a time to honor and celebrate caregivers! Did you know that November is National Family Caregivers month? I sure didn’t! Sadly, just like most of our tireless efforts supporting…
Shatter the Nevers
When I became a mother to my son, Skyler, I had many dreams and plans. Even at the age of 3 when he was diagnosed with autism and the landscape & process for when and how he would achieve those dreams changed, I held on tight. With each visit to the various medical providers throughout…
Unexplained Bruises
It never gets easier. The wondering, the worrying and ultimately the sadness of never knowing the cause or scenario behind new injuries. My 21-year-old, nonverbal autistic son came home from his autism center with this shiner and he’s unable to tell us how it happened. And it’s not just the bumps & bruises randomly appearing…
Energy of Surrender
It’s taken me 49 years to recognize a very important concept… the energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control. And I have my nonspeaking, autistic 21-year-old son, Skyler to thank for teaching me that valuable lesson. You see, as much as I hope, pray & dream that Skyler will become even…
Physical Communication
For approximately 19 years, I have been slapped and hit daily. The culprit…my 21-year-old son Skyler, who is on the severe end of the autism spectrum, is non-speaking, has global motor difficulties and suffers from Crohn’s disease. He uses physical contact as his primary method of communication. We’ve tried every tactic shared with us…
Energy of Surrender
It’s taken me 49 years to recognize a very important concept… the energy of surrender accomplishes much more than the energy of control. And I have my nonspeaking, autistic 21-year-old son, Skyler to thank for teaching me that valuable lesson. You see, as much as I hope, pray & dream that Skyler will become even…
Physical Communication
For approximately 19 years, I have been slapped and hit daily. The culprit…my 21-year-old son Skyler, who is on the severe end of the autism spectrum, is non-speaking, has global motor difficulties and suffers from Crohn’s disease. He uses physical contact as his primary method of communication. We’ve tried every tactic shared with us…
Proving Your Worth
Today was a tough day. In fact, one I’ve somehow been able to avoid for 17 years. My nonverbal, severely autistic adult son had to undergo an IQ test / Psychological Assessment in order to ‘prove’ his continued need for services provided by the Medicaid waiver. Because we all know kids outgrow autism and don’t…
Beauty in the Journey
I have a confession to make… I lack the ability to sit still and am a hoarder of all things pertaining to my kids. Whether it’s the adorable creations crafted by their own little hands or papers pertaining to each of their individual experiences with education (IEPs, report cards, therapy notes, A+ essays, science projects,…
Aging Out
The days are growing shorter as that dreaded time draws near, His age dictates there’s no longer a need, so services and programming abruptly disappear. At the moment of diagnosis, I was told all the things my son would never do, “But look at him now,” I scream aloud, “Your predictions were so untrue.” He…
Where Do You See Yourself
Where do you see yourself in the next 5 years? It’s a question I’ve been asked more than a dozen times throughout my life in various situations – post college graduation and job interviews are among the most common scenarios. Back then, I would answer confidently, sharing the goals and visions I had set for…
Party of Three
This is us. A forever, inseparable party of three. Weekends spent in perpetual motion, trying to keep our 20-year-old, autistic, nonverbal son entertained. Always on repeat, his mind and body requiring the same regimented plan for the day. Awakened at dawn due to urine-soaked bedding followed by a quick shower and demand for his favorite…
The Hug of My Life
Twenty years… That’s how long I’ve waited for a simple hug from my son. You see, my 20-year-old son Skyler is on the severe end of the autism spectrum, is non-speaking, has global motor difficulties and suffers from Crohn’s disease. Frequently people ask me how I know that Skyler loves me or appreciates the great…
Just Keep Trying
Routines are an essential part of life for many on the spectrum and my son Skyler definitely demands consistency. I’ve spent this entire weekend parenting solo and essentially filling as Joshua Hellmann (aka Skyler’s favorite person) doing all the special things they normally do together while Josh is out of town running the Cleveland Marathon….
What is your plan?
My son Skyler is on the severe end of the autism spectrum, is non-verbal and suffers from Crohn’s disease. He is one week away from turning 20-years-old and I’m not prepared. I recently sat down with Skyler’s case manager, who I absolutely adore, for our annual meeting to discuss the waiver service options and hours…
Dismissed and Underestimated
My 19-year-old son has Ulcerative Colitis, non-verbal autism, complex needs and global motor difficulties. He has been dismissed, underestimated and deemed incapable his entire life by those who are trained to support, teach and encourage his growth and development. I attended a meeting at his autism center yesterday with the understanding we would be discussing…
Aging out of the system
My 19-year-old son has Ulcerative Colitis, non-verbal autism, complex needs and global motor difficulties. That description is getting harder to repeat … not because of the various diagnoses but based on the heavily uncertain future for adults on the spectrum, the sheer mention of his age sends me into panic. With the holidays now a…
Just Keep Trying
Routines are an essential part of life for many on the spectrum and my son Skyler definitely demands consistency. I’ve spent this entire weekend parenting solo and essentially filling as Joshua Hellmann (aka Skyler’s favorite person) doing all the special things they normally do together while Josh is out of town running the Cleveland Marathon….
A Beautiful Mind
Understanding the inner workings of the body and mind is extremely difficult, but as the parent caregiver of a non-speaking young adult diagnosed with autism and Ulcerative Colitis, I feel like the last 19 years have been an endless game of charades. Although there are plentiful books on the subject, the early phase of motherhood…
I’m Tired
I’m in a funk – a particularly dark head space that is centered around jealousy. I would normally suffer in silence and be ashamed to openly admit my truth, but I think it’s important to be honest and share because I suspect I’m not alone. We’ve come so far in many ways with Skyler’s communication…
Celebrating Motherhood
The Mother’s Day holiday is one of my favorite days of the year. I genuinely enjoy celebrating being the mother of two incredible kids more than my birthday, Christmas and Valentine’s Day combined. Like many little girls who played house with their dolls as children, I often depicted the ‘perfect’ mother as I imagined her…
Autism Siblings – The Unsung Heroes
In a world in which siblings are typically our first playmates and our best friends, my daughter Kendall was destined for a different childhood from what most kids experience. Having a brother with severe, non-verbal autism has forced her to grow up, in many ways, alone. Kendall and Skyler unconsciously switched roles many years ago,…
A Letter To My Son… As He Turns Eighteen
Beginning on Skyler’s first birthday, I started a tradition of writing a letter to him highlighting his likes, dislikes, achievements, funny moments, family adventures, playmates, and favorite television shows. In addition, I take a photo of him wearing a necktie as a way of charting his growth. My vision when creating and continuing this annual…
Rites of Passage
I’m going to be completely honest and vulnerable here. I’ve been struggling with my emotions the last few weeks and haven’t really felt much like writing, talking or doing much of anything. I don’t usually let my feelings thoroughly overtake me, but this is a really momentous year for our family – one that seemed…
The Impact of Childhood Experiences on Parenting
A person’s upbringing can explain a lot about their views, values and perspectives regarding every situation or difficulty they encounter. We each gather various life lessons and personality traits along the way which impacts every decision we make and how we choose to parent our children. When I reflect back on my own childhood experiences,…
The Special Love and Purposeful Parenting of an Autism Mom
In the Fall of 2002, I found out I was pregnant with my first child. I was elated and spent the entire pregnancy planning and preparing for the next 18 years of my new son’s life – unaware that none of those plans would come to fruition. After three long years of medical issues, unmet…
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My Courageous Son – You Are An Inspiration
Until I became the mother to an incredible son with autism, I had always associated courage with someone who exudes great bravery, like running into a burning building or pulling an injured motorist from their mangled car to safety. Being courageous is actually having the moral strength and quality of spirit to face difficulty and…
Cherish Every Moment
Whether currently, or at one time or another in our lives, I think most of us have experienced the feeling of not having control in a situation, or not knowing what to do, or what is the best decision to make. Perhaps you’ve felt helpless, emotionally overwhelmed or as if you just couldn’t stand one…
Remaining resilient as a special-needs parent during these uncertain times
We all to one extent or another face difficult times. We have had to learn how to navigate through challenging situations and go on with our lives… some people seemingly have the ability to manage this better than others. Lessons Being A Mom to An Autistic Child Has Taught Me As a caregiver and parent…
Pausing and Living for Today
This unprecedented time of sheltering at home amid fear of contracting the novel coronavirus (COVID-19) — or, God forbid, infecting someone we love — has brought out the best and the worst in us all. Stress levels are at an all-time high and learning to work, study, communicate and perform routine daily tasks virtually has…
Life Lessons Being a Mom to An Autistic Child Has Taught Me
The old adage “stop and smell the roses” has never been a more fitting description of my life than it has been here recently. In fact, it’s become my motto … my continuous reminder during this unique time in our lives where, like many of you, I find myself wrapped up in overwhelming feelings of…
Embracing Your Path with an Open Mind
As with many things in life, if you knew how challenging your journey would be to take you to your final destination, you may never opt to take the first step. This has truth in your career — would you ever jump into your dream profession if you knew the struggles you would go through…
Your Story Matters, Welcome to My Life
We each have a story. In fact, each of our stories is as unique as our own fingerprints … our own DNA … our own life’s tapestry. Some of us openly share our stories, realizing that in sharing we are connecting. Others of us hide behind the story that we tell others and the story…
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Inclusion
One of the most overwhelming concerns a special needs family faces is the fear of isolation from our communities. We must always weigh the decision whether venturing out will be worth the anxiety or misunderstandings and judgement from onlookers should our child be triggered and their behaviors become troublesome. While I’m a big believer in…
Socializing and Isolation – The Struggle is Real
While I intend no disrespect for the meaning behind the Memorial Day holiday, the thought of any long, holiday weekend or break from our routine always gives me a bit of anxiety. Unlike most of the world, who likely use the bonus day off work to relax and unwind with friends and family, many autism…
